So why am I a lazy personal trainer?



I'm trying! Follow my quest to OVERCOME LAZY!

Thursday, June 30, 2011

How I Overcame Lazy This Week: I Officially Declare My Independence (From Laziness)

It’s finally the 4th of July holiday weekend!  And we’ve got a beach vacation on the agenda.

Great new novel to read?  Check
Little nest egg I’ve been saving for shopping spree?  Check
Birthday cake fixins to celebrate two birthdays?  Check
(Neither my brother nor I was born on the 4th of July, but close!)

Ummm, I think he's declared his
independence from laziness...
but not hunkiness!!!

Oh, and tennis racquets, and bicycles and hiking boots and wet suits (did I mention it’s the Oregon coast?  Brrrrrr!) Check, check, check and check!

Yes, while there will be plenty of relaxation and indulgence, this will not be a vacation from our active and adventurous ways.

Nope.  In fact, in the true spirit of Independence Day, this week I’m declaring my family’s independence from Lazy!  Like our forefathers 235 years before us, we feel Lazy has been unfairly taxing us.  Most certainly, Lazy has been brutally taxing ON us in many ways by constantly threatening to authoritatively rule our thoughts and actions to make us virtual pawns in its imperialistic fast hold.

Well, not the “T” family.  We are declaring war on Lazy!

Here’s our official Declaration of Independence From Lazy:
(Don’t worry:  it’s waaaaaay shorter than the original… and possibly a little less dry).

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to hoist their lazy posteriors off the couch and to wrest the Cheetos bag from their steely grip and to assume among the power of human nature, the magnificent potential yet imperfect qualities with which we are all bestowed from Nature’s God, that a decent respect to their well-being requires that they should declare the intentions which impel them to pursue an improved, un-lazy lifestyle.

We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created with flaws, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unenviable Characteristics, that among these are slothfulness, gluttony and the pursuit of Laziness.  That to overcome these tendencies, Exercises and Nutrition Programs are instituted among Men and Women, deriving their degree of effectiveness from the dedication of the participants.  That whenever any Form of Laziness threatens to overtake our lifestyle, it is the Right and Duty of the People to  alter or abolish it… and kick its arse* to the curb!!!**

This is war, Lazy!  We’re sick of you trying to dominate our lives.  We’re knocking you off your high and mighty throne and wiping that smug, confident smirk off your face!  You’ve ruled our thoughts and actions long enough.  You are our dictator no longer!  We’re the new Superpower in town now and just wait till you see what we become in 235 years….or more like, 5, since we’ll be dead in 235 years!


We’re already winning some of the battles, however something tells me this is gonna be a looooong war.  But - like our founding fathers discovered – it’s well worth the fight!


*When I use naughty words I tend to use a cockney accent.
**Also, I try not to use massive amounts of run-on sentences (not that I haven’t!) like our friend Tommy Jefferson but I wanted to remain true to the style of this historic document.

Friday, June 24, 2011

How I Overcame Lazy This Week: I Ditched The Kids!

I ran across this pic at
The Great Fitness Experiment
My daughters are one of the greatest joys of my existence.  I feel so blessed to have them in my life and to be able to spend my days with them full-time.  I love my little family. 

And yet, I have to say, as Grandma chauffeured the girls off for a sleepover, I stood waving good-bye and was awash with a giddy feeling of… freedom!  What to do first?!  My initial action was to do a kind of involuntary happy dance; it just sort of spontaneously sprung forth.  Next, I ran inside and blared the music that I wanted to listen to without worrying a whit about its appropriateness for the five-and-under set. 

And then… I got down and dirty.  Oh yeah, folks, I went into a House. Cleaning. FRENZY!!!  The carpets hadn’t been shampooed for months, the tile hadn’t been mopped for days and I had nobody getting in my way, demanding sippy cups and potty breaks nor making me feel guilty for not paying attention to them.  I was in heaven!

Ugh.  I’m a full-fledged, boring “housewife,” aren’t I? 

In my defense, my very first fantasy was, in fact, to hop in the car and go on a shopping frenzy.  However, that yearning was quickly quashed by the fact we have no expendable income and K was at work with the car; hence my enthusiastic focus on the next available option.

As I came to a cleaning break, it hit me that, despite my lack of motorized transportation, I wasn’t tethered to the house like I usually am.  I realized I could go out and do any type of workout I wanted to do for as long as I wanted without having to worry about the usual 20-minute prep of sunscreening, pottying, packing snacks/drinks, etc.  Nope, I just had to lace up my sneaks and head out!  I went for a neighborhood run.  I was in paradise!

Then when K got home later that night, we were discussing what in the world we were going to do with our kid-free morning the next day.  We were glumly listing the errands and home projects that we needed to get done when suddenly, it hit me that I’ve been wanting to go trail biking.  K’s been able to go a few times recently with friends, but I’ve had to stay with the girls because it’s not a very-young-kid-friendly activity. It struck us that we were unencumbered with the kiddos and we would be remiss to not take advantage of this sublime situation.  We were in ecstasy!

Quick aside: Two words for my mountain biking experience:  Awe.  Some.  This will be a topic for another blog posting very soon here, but I’ll just leave it at that for now.  Incredible.  Okay, now I’ll leave it.  Exhilarating.  For real, I’m done.  FAN-FREAKING-TASTIC!!!

What was a happy realization from all of this is that, when faced with the delicious prospect of some self-indulgent free-time, what I truly was most excited about was the option to do some lively, un-lazy activities that I haven’t been able to do recently and I actually got out and did them!

Now, don’t get me wrong, I LOVE relaxing down time that involves a good book or a good movie.  I LOVE indulging in some yummy treats that I don’t have to share with anyone else!  And I manage to do those things occasionally as well, but I like being in a place right now that, when give the choice, my first desire is to do something fun and active and to just jump in and enjoy life!

I also want it understood that I LOVE adventuring with my girls and even thrive on the challenge of ensuring their participation and enjoyment of our active lifestyle.  But, boy, it sure was nice and a bit refreshing to be a little selfish! 

So, my advice:  take a break from something that usually gobbles up your time and energy (kids, work, America's Got Talent re-runs, etc.) and do something un-lazy for YOURSELF!  It’s usually a win-win situation.

When we went to pick them up, the girls didn’t even complain when we smothered them with sweaty, stinky hugs and kisses.  They'd had a blast with the grandparents and I think they enjoyed their little break from us as much as we did!